Celebrating Father’s Day when we don't have children.
It’s crazy, right? That's what most of my friends think and I'm okay with that. It isn't going to change the practice of me buying a little something and writing out a few thoughts for My Handsome Man every Father’s Day.
The way I see it, five years ago when my (now) husband got down on one knee and asked me to marry him, I didn't just say “yes” to a wedding. I said “yes” to spending the rest of my life with this man. “Yes” to raising a family with this man. From the moment I said “yes,” he became the Father I chose for the children I would have.
I am not the best at expressing feelings with words, and as mushy as this sounds I am so incredibly grateful for the man that he is. I fell in love with this guy many times and for many different reasons, one of those reasons was the Father I can see him being.
I get the privilege now of watching those Father traits grow; of noticing new aspects of his personality and talents that he has developed. I notice details that make me fall for him a little more. Each Father’s Day I have the opportunity to write those details down. I get to tell him about how I see him; the qualities I notice in him and the way he embraces life that makes me look forward to welcoming a child or two into our lives. I am able to thank him for the way he cares and works hard to provide for our little family.
There is always the chance that we won't be able to have children and I know that Father’s Day and Mother’s Day are difficult days for those who struggle with infertility. This is another reason I choose to celebrate, to try and minimise that pain if it's something we have to deal with. He is, and always will be, the man I chose to be the Father to my children, whether we are blessed with them or not. I choose to celebrate that choice every year. I chose him because of the man he is, and the qualities I already see.
So My Handsome Man,
I love you.
Happy Father's Day.